'Should' is a word that features heavily in my inner-monologue.
I 'Should' get dressed as soon as I wake up.
I 'Should' be on top of all the housework.
I 'Should' get the twins out in the fresh air everyday.
I 'Should' eat healthily
I 'Should' exercise
I 'should' take the twins to mother and toddler groups.
And so it goes, on and on, and on.
I know that many of these things would enhance my life, and the life's of my children.
But I'm tired. I'm tired of the never-ending insidious echo of the 'shoulds'. I'm tired of not knowing whether to do 'A' or 'B'
I'm tired of fighting with myself, and with time, from the minute I get up in the morning, until the minute I go to bed at night.
I know that these are not huge issues. I know I'm in a valley, and will climb my way out of it. I'm just tired of being my own worst enemy.
I'm tired of hearing my own voice say 'You should...'